Monday, July 27, 2009

The Idiot's Guide to Driving

I hate idiots on the road. Those driving slower than me are senior citizens, those driving faster are maniacs and those who cut me off are morons to the extreme. Not so long ago I had someone cut me off. Twice. In the span of one minute. To the owner of the silver Honda Civic that nearly caused me to run off the freeway and curse explicitly in front of my young children, You, madam, are an IDIOT!

These feelings inside me can only be described as road rage. Or perhaps intolerance for those less perfect than me, but either way, when I'm behind the wheel I have desires to honk the horn and let gestures fly.

Something about the illusion of privacy in the car makes normally rational people act a bit crazy. I've seen many behaviors like bird flipping, fist shaking, and even nose picking (although last time I checked, that rarely is caused from road rage). Here is my message to all the bad drivers of the world: If you are an idiot, get off the road because the rational lot of us hate to be forced into our crazy place!


  1. P.S. Magenta, if you read this, HUGE congrats on winning an ARC of Maze Runner!

  2. I channel my road rage into my gas pedal, which helps me stay cooler-headed and gets me to places much quicker.

  3. Should we pass that info on to the local sheriff, Kirk? LOL. Sometimes I'm the idiot, I'm rarely the road rager. I like to take my driving casually and get to where I'm going in one piece...sanity intact. I know its boring but there you have it.

  4. I'm a speeder, no two ways about it.

  5. Seattle is known for its "nice" drivers. I was mad at my sister when I realized she had become a Utah driver. Now I am one and I can't STAND to drive in Washington State. At All!!!!

    I flip and flop. Sometimes I am slamming down the gas pedal and at other times I am 5 under day dreaming along the road. There was a time when I shouldn't have been driving, but I did and all survived.

  6. My husband is the road rager in our family. We have had many near "incidents" at the roundabout in Lehi.

    I used to be a lead foot and now I'm a nervous nilly. I guess I spent too many years on L.A. freeways...